Thursday, September 30, 2010

The marvel of Indian wisdom
Darbha grass also called Kusha or Munja
Whenever a priest used darbha grass on rituals, festivals, tied them as a ring I always wondered at the significance. Was happy to read an article by Ranjeni A Singh who explained its significance.
It is a dull yellow coloured grass.
A doctor covering his hand with the darbha grass had his palm x-rayed. To his surprise he found that the grass absorbed about 60% of the radiation. Can one conclude that it can absorb negative energies from the atmosphere also?
Darbha grass is identified with Lord Vishnu and it is believed to possess the power to purify anything.
It is believed to have been produced during the cosmic churning of the ocean of milk.
Sakyamuni Buddha is believed to have sat on a mat made of darbha grass when he got enlightened under the Boddhi Tree.
The name of Kushinagara, where the Buddha was cremated, is believed to be derived from Darbha's other name Kusha.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Chapter 2 lesson 1
What affected Arjuna at this stage was not a sense of righteousness but a weakness of heart. It is like a doctor, surgeon, whose ‘dharma’ is to cut open a person to cure but at the time of operation he places down his medical instruments and says he cannot go through it. They had tried all methods for peace and reconciliation, his wife Draupadi had been humiliated beyond imagination…(A daughter-in-law, a queen was tried to be disrobed in an open assembly where her husbands, brothers-in –law, fathers-in-law were present…Such a thing has never ever happened in the history of mankind. Can you imagine it happening in our parliament today ? Inconceivable!
One must constantly remember that Arjuna was a soldier. And as a soldier his ‘dharma’ was to fight, to get what was rightfully his, to avenge Draupadi’s honour.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Geeta Chapter 1 Lesson 2
At Kurukshetra all the famous warriors from both sides (Pandavas and Kauravas) had assembled. Hundreds of conches blared. Krishna was to act as the charioteer of Arjuna. Arjuna requested Krishna to place the chariot between the two armies. As Arjuna surveyed his opponents he saw fathers, grandfathers, teachers, uncles, sons, relatives, friends…A feeling of despondency took over him. He wondered whether the victory (if it came to him) would be worth the carnage. The bow slipped from Arjuna’s hands and he turned to Lord Krishna for guidance.
The first chapter of the Geeta is called ‘The Yoga of the despondency of Arjuna’ Why is it called yoga?
There comes a point in everyone’s life when one has tried all means to control situations to ones liking, when one just ‘lets the bow fall’ and that is when the enquiry starts. All journeys start with the first step...the first step towards the philosophic quest is the enquiry: "Athato Brahmn Jignasa"...
Then starts the sadhana, the spiritual effort the seeker puts in. The word sadhana is derived from the root word 'sidh' which means 'to be accomplished' in 'seeking divinity' The quest starts 'out' and ends in the knowing that there is no 'separation'...

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Geeta Chapter 1
Dhritrashtra was the blind father of Duryodhana and his brothers (Kauravas).
(Explanations do not suggest that the Mahabharata is an allegory)
It was the extreme attachment of Dhritrashtra for his children that blinded him to ‘dharma’ truth justice…
Dhritrashtra believed blindly that physical might would triumph.
Dhritrashtra asks Sanjaya: What did the Pandavas and my sons do, when they had assembled on the holy land of Kurukshetra, eager to fight O Sanjaya?
The fascinating thing that happens now is that Sanjaya gives Dhritrashtra a moment to moment account about what happens in Kurukshetra.
Less than a hundred years ago, one would have thought that it was fantasy, magic or that Sanjaya had spiritual powers. Maybe Sanjaya did but now in the ‘Live television broadcast’ zamana that we live in, it is so much easier to believe.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Lesson 9
Mantras for studies
I love the following Mantra and I am amazed at the wisdom of our ancestors.
It is a Mantra to be chanted before one starts one's studies.
But what amazes me is its last line which states that 'May we not (have ego clashes) quarrel with one another. ie students and teachers.
The ancestors and Scriptures said that one has to have certain requisites before becoming a student. One of them is to come with an empty clean vessel.
It is only then that the wisdom of the Scripture will fill one.

and now the mantra:

Om Sahana Vavatu, Sahanao Bhunaktu
Sahaveeryam Karvaa vahai
Tejaswee Naava Dheeta Mastu
Ma Vidvishaa vahai
Om Shanti Shanti Shanti

Loosely translated it means:
I pray that You (God) help me teach.
You (God) help me (student) learn!
May our study be brilliant and may we not misunderstand!(and quarrel due to our ego)
Om Peace, Peace, Peace!

A prayer to Mother Saraswati (Goddess of Learning)
Mantra to be chanted before you begin your studies:
Saraswati namastubhyam
Varde Kaamarupini
Vidyarambham karishyami
Siddhir bhavatu me sadaa
It means:
My humble prostrations unto Thee, O Goddess Saraswati,
You are the fulfiller of all my wishes,
I start my studies, with the request that I achieve perfection in them.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Lesson 8 The Palace of illusions

I have tried to explain in such few words, the Mahabharat, Arjuna, Draupadi before we enter the Divine Dialogue, the Geeta.


I have been reading The Palace of Illusions by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni

The author has placed Draupadi in the forefront of the action…her joys, doubts, struggles, triumphs, heartbreaks, achievements…
Presenting some of the excerpts that have touched my heart.

Dhai Ma says to young Draupadi:
…“Love comes like lightening and disappears the same way. If you are lucky it strikes you right…I advise you to forget about love, princess. Pleasure is simpler and duty more important. Learn to be satisfied by them”



Krishna says to Draupadi:
…“A problem becomes a problem only if you believe it to be so, and often others see you as you see yourself”…

…“As for being pawns , ar’nt we all pawns in the hands of Time, the greatest player of them all”…

When Draupadi asked Krishna what kind of palace He thought she should have, Krishna said: “Already you live within a nine-gated palace, the most wondrous structure of all. Understand it well: it will be your salvation or your downfall.”

Draupadi said: “If I am a queen I owe it to my palace.”
Krishna frowned and said: “Don’t be so attached to what is, after all, no more than metal and stone and asura sleight of hand. All things in this world change and pass away—some after many years, some overnight. Appreciate the Palace of Illusions , by all means. But if you identify so deeply with it, you set yourself up for sorrow.”

… Krishna gazed into my eyes. Was it love I saw in his face? If so, it was different in kind from all the loves I knew. Or perhaps the loves I had known had been something different, and this alone was love. It reached past my body, my thoughts, my shaking heart, into some part of me that I hadn’t known existed. My eyes closed of their own accord. I felt myself coming apart like the braided edge of a shawl, the threads reaching everywhere…

…Can’t you ever be serious? I asked mortified.
“It’s difficult,” He ( Krishna ) said. “There’s so little in life that’s worth it”….

…”They’re saying the gods are angry at Sisupal’s death.”
“Priests like to say such things” Krishna replied. He didn’t seem too concerned about the anger of the gods…

When Draupadi was being disrobed:
…The wind smelled of sandalwood. Krishna sat beside me on a cool stone bench. His glance was bright and tender. “No one can shame you, He said, if you don’t allow it”
It came to me in a wash of amazement, that He was right.
Let them stare at my nakedness I thought. Why should I care? They and not I should be ashamed for shattering the bounds of decency”.
Was that not miracle enough?
Krishna nodded. He took my hands. At His touch I felt my muscles relax, my fists open. He smiled, and I prepared to smile back…

… “A situation in itself is neither happy or unhappy. It’s only your response to it that gives you sorrow. But enough of philosophy, I am hungry…”

Krishna explains to Draupadi about hatred

…Suddenly Krishna reached out and pulled a half burnt stick from the fire. He thrust it at me so that I flinched back.
“What are you doing?” I cried startled and angry.
“Trying to show you something. The stick—it scared you right? It may even have hurt you, if you hadn’t been so quick. But look –in trying to burn you, It’s consuming itself. That’s what happens to a heart---“

Draupadi thinks later:
“I know you want me to drop my hatred, Krishna ” I whispered, It’s the one thing you’ve asked me for. But I can’t. Even if I wanted to. I don’t know how anymore”
Outside the hut, the shal trees bent and swayed, their leaves like sighs.

…I knew that the remedy lay not in finding a new flower but in what Krishna had advised me over and over again: Let the past go. Be at ease. Allow the future to arrive at its own pace, unfurling its secrets when it will. I knew I should live the life that teemed around me: this clear air, this newborn sunlight, the simple comfort of the shawl around my shoulders…”

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Lesson 7 Geeta Introdution to Geeta

Draupadi, the Queen but more importantly Draupadi was 'Krishna's Sakhee'. 'Sakhee' means friend. Krishna's special name for Draupadi was 'sakhee'. She was married to one of Krishna's best friends, Arjun, the Pandava Prince. Draupadi was a courageous queen with a dynamic personality. Even Duryodhan (a Kaurava) grudgingly admitted to her greatness. She was in a way, the revolving kingpin of the Mahabharata war. Draupadi was married to the five brothers (Pandavas) at the same time. The above proves that it was acceptable, during those days for a woman to marry more than one man. She lived as a wife to each brother for a year in rotation. She was a beloved of all her husbands. The Kauravas (jealous cousins of the Pandavas) had been rankled by a remark uttered by Draupadi in a moment of weakness. They invited the Pandavas for a game of dice where the Kauravas cheated and the Pandavas lost Draupadi in a gamble.

Indignant Draupadi proved that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Draupadi questioned her husband Yudhishtra, if he had pledged her before or after he had lost himself in the gamble. She argued that if he had pledged himself first, he had no right over her as he was already a slave.
She later challenged the game as illegal as she argued that Duryodhan, a Kaurava, had not placed his brothers and wife as a matching stake.
Because of evil omens that started to manifest, the old king Dhritrashtra tried to appease Draupadi by asking her to ask for any boons of her choice.
Draupadi asked for the freedom of her husbands. The old king begged her to ask for the kingdom.
Draupadi vehemently refused and proudly proclaimed that her husbands would win back their kingdom and that she did not want the gift of a kingdom which was theirs by right.
Draupadi took a vow that she would not oil or tie her hair until the Kaurava Dushyaasan was killed. The latter was responsible for dragging her to court to humiliate her.
It is believed that the queen eventually oiled her hair with the blood of Dushyaasan.

The Kauravas wanted to humiliate the Pandavas and hence dragged Draupadi to the main hall and tried to disrobe her in public. She implored to Krishna who she affectionately called 'Sakha'(friend). Krishna came to her rescue and miraculously kept Draupadi clothed, despite the fact that the Kauravas kept pulling at her saree. Draupadi's faith in Krishna never wavered even though she went through very difficult times.
Much later when her husband Yudhishtra wanted to renounce the world, Draupadi rebuked him. She held him responsible for bringing sorrow to the family. She reminded him that she had suffered intensely. Not only had she been deeply humiliated, but she had unfairly lost her 5 sons in the war. Yet she opted to live on.
Her 'Sakha' Krishna recognised Draupadi's qualities. He was aware of her deep devotion and faith to him. He never let her down. He appeared whenever she summoned. The most dramatic instance is when Dushyaasan tried to pull her saree off her. She turned to Krishna as her husbands bowed their heads in shame. He came to her aid yet once again. The saree became endless. Metres and metres were added miraculously, until Dushyaasan gave up defeated.
Krishna's and Draupadi's friendship had withstood the supreme test.
Draupadi's five sons were killed by Ashwatthaama. Yet she spared the latter's life because he was the son of the Pandava's guru. Draupadi ruled for 36 years, after which she renounced worldly life and walked away to the Himalayas, when her grandson Parikshit was crowned as king.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Lesson 6 (Introduction to Geeta)
Lord Krishna tried everything to bring about peace between the warring cousins.
Every effort failed. War became inevitable.
Durodhana from the side of the Kauravas and Arjuna from the side of the Pandavas went to Dwarka to seek the help of Krishna in the battle.
Krishna was resting in a couch in his palace.
Duryodhana stood at the head of the couch while Arjuna stood near the feet.
When Krishna opened his eyes he naturally saw Arjuna first and therefore gave him the first choice.
Arjuna was asked to choose between Krishna’s powerful army, called the Narayani Sena or Krishna unarmed. (He would not participate in the battle)
Arjuna chose the Lord.
Arjuna knew that the Lord by his side was worth more than his powerful army.
This is the way a spiritual person thinks, and that is what is called ‘faith’
Duryodhana pretended to be disappointed and thought that Arjuna was foolish to have made the above choice.
Duyodhana took Krishna’s mighty army to help the Kaurava side of the battle.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Lesson 5
One worships Ganeshji before the start of anything auspicious. He is resourceful. Ganeshji offered to write the Vedas as Ved Vyaasji dictated. But there was a condition to fulfill. Ganeshji could not stop writing...It so happened that Ganeshji's pen broke as he wrote. Without a moment hesitation he used his broken tusk as a pen...So we hope that Ganeshji will always be there as and when an obstacle arises...
The broken tusk symbolically means that Ganpatiji is beyond duality.
One of the famous mantras dedicated to Ganpati follows:

Vakratunda Mahaakaaya Suryakotee Sama Prabha
Nirvighnam kuru mey Deva
Sarva kaaryeshu Sarvadaa

Vakratunda means curved trunk


Mahakaaya means large bodied

Surya kotee ,million suns

Sama Prabha means with the brilliance of

Nirvighnam means free of obstacles

Kuru means make

mey means my

Deva means Lord

Sarva Kaaryeshu means in all work


Sarvada means always

O Lord Ganesha of Large body, curved trunk, with the brilliance of a million suns, please make all my work free of obstacles, always.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Lesson 4 Geeta

It is important and a regular practice to offer obeisance to the Scripture before entering into it. I have heard that if one perseveres in reading the Scriptures, they open out their deeper meaning to you.

The following mantra can also be recited when one is going through troubled times.

Mookam karoti vaachaalam (pronounce oo like in room)
Pangum langhayatey girim (ey like in whey)u like in put
Yatkripaa tamaham vandey (aa like in car)
Paramaananda Maadhavam

Which means:
I salute that Madhava (Krishna)
the source of Supreme Bliss,
whose Grace makes the dumb man eloquent
and the cripple cross mountains

A dumb man eloquent? It could mean literally or it could mean that on some, the Grace is poured where they become instruments to expound deep truths.

Cripple cross mountains? It could mean literally and also, by the Lord's Grace some are able to go through difficult times, or to go where only their effort alone would not be able to take them.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Lesson 3 Geeta

Before we enter the Geeta, it is important that we know under what circumstances, the Geeta was sung. The wisdom of the dialogue between Krishna and Arjuna is independant of this story, but knowing how the Great War came about is relevant for our understanding.





The Mahabhaarata is considered a Great Epic of India and was compiled by the Sage Ved Vyaasa.

It tells us the history of Indian ancestors. It also describes to us their moral values, their Dharma...



Dharma is generally explained away as 'religion, duty...In the Hindu concept 'Dharma' means a lot more. When the children are young it is the 'dharma' of a mother to look after them, but as the children, come of age, it is the 'dharma' of the same mother to 'let them go'



It is the Dharma of a soldier to fight and the dharma of an ascetic, not to.





Now read on:



The Mahabhaarata tells us the story that transpired in and around Hastinapura.

The story spans around 6 generations.

Though the Mahabharata has the story of many lives woven into one another, the predominant narration is of 2 brothers and their families.

Dhritrashtra and Pandu were brothers. Dhritrashtra married Gandhaari and Pandu married Kunti and Madri.

Pandu had 5 sons who are popularly known as Pandavas.

Dhriraashtra had 100 sons.They were called the Kauravas.

Pandu died and the Pandavas and Kauravas were brought up together.

The Kaurava’s maternal uncle Shakuni played a crucial role in the story of the Mahabhaarata.

The Pandavas performed a great sacrifice (Yajna) which made Duryodhana, the chief of the Kauravas jealous and greedy.

Shakuni invited the Pandavas for a game of dice and cheated in the game.

The Pandavas lost all their possessions including Draupadi, their wife.

The Kauravas wanted to humiliate the Pandavas and hence dragged Draupadi to the main hall and tried to disrobe her in public.

She implored to Krishna who she affectionately called ‘Sakha’. Krishna came to her aid and miraculously kept Draupadi draped, despite the fact that the Kauravas kept pulling at her saree.

Finally, the Pandavas and Kauravas reached a settlement. The Pandavas were made to go to the forest for 12 years. They had to live for one more year in the forest incognito. The condition was that the Pandavas should not be traced by the Kauravas. While the Pandavas were away, the kingdom was to be ruled by the wicked Duryodhana.

The 13 years of exile were completed successfully. The Pandavas approached the Kauravas for their share of the kingdom.

However Duryodhana refused to part with as much land as would be covered by a needle.

Krishna tried very hard that the Pandavas and Kauravas reach an amicable agreement, but the Kauravas refused to relent.

War became inevitable. Both the Pandavas and the Kauravas wanted Krishna to help them. The Pandava Arjuna was a devotee and friend of Lord Krishna. Arjuna chose to have Krishna alone on his side, despite the fact that Krishna had warned that the latter would not pick up arms in the battle.

Duryodhana was overjoyed at Arjuna’s decision and chose to have Krishna’s powerful army to fight with him.

Just before the great war, Arjuna became despondent. He did not know which course to adopt. Would it be better for him to fight and have so many people killed, or should he renounce the Kingdom and take to a life in the forest.

This question also appears many times in a man’s life when faced with difficulties.

When one is restless and life seems difficult, we would like to give up.

Krishna explains to Arjuna that to fight (to face difficulties) with courage, is the right path. Arjuna asked Krishna many more questions which the latter answered, in a simple forthright manner.

Krishna explained to Arjuna that he should only be concerned with performing his duty to the best of his capacity, the fruits or results of the action, lie with God.

Krishna said:

Karmanye Vaadhikaa rastey, maa phaleshu kadaachana
Maa karmaphal hetur bhoor
Maa te sangostwa karmani.

The above dialogue is recorded in the Mahabharata and is known as the the Bhagvad Geeta.

It is said that if the Mahabharata can be compared to a priceless necklace, the Geeta is the pendant.

The terrible war of Mahabharata was fought. The Pandavas emerged victorious.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

I have been requested to write about teachings in the Bhagvad Geeta as an ongoing exercise.
Geeta Lesson 1


A lot of us do not seem to know the difference between Shrimad Bhagvad
and the Bhagvad Geeta.

The Shrimad Bhagvad is a 'Purana' (ancient scripture) in which is narrated the lives of the different Incarnations of God, the most important being the Lives of Sri Ram and Sri Krishna. It also deals with the Creation of the Universe. It exudes Knowledge and devotion. Its stories are pregnant with moral, symbolic and practical value.

The Bhagvad Geeta is 'The Song of God'. It is pure philosophy and is a dialogue between Sri Krishna and His dear friend Arjuna, just before the great war of Mahabharata was fought. The Bhagavad Geeta is part of the great Epic 'Mahabharata'. It is said that if the Mahabharata is a necklace, the Geeta is Its pendant.

Leson 2

If I were asked what I thought the message of the Geeta was in a sentence, I would say: "Do your best, and leave the rest".

I have always believed that once one puts all efforts towards any cause to the best of ones capacity, one is a winner, no matter what the consequences.

Krishna, in the Bhagavad Geeta states the above, in a more complicated way, in the 47th verse of the 2nd Chapter.

A lot of people believe that Spiritualism is for those, who seek an escape from life. If that is so, why is Krishna urging Arjuna to fight for what is rightfully his? Does not that mean that life was not meant for escaping to the hills but to face up to life's challenges?

However one must remember that Krishna tried his best to bring about a reconciliation between the warring cousins, Also Krishna's message was directed to a soldier whose dharma (roughly translated as duty) was to defend his integrity, and the honor of his wife, on whom an attempt had been made to disrobe in public.


Jai Shree Krishna
Shakun

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

We celebrate RadhaRani's birthday on the 15th of September 2010

Vedic Literature explains that Radha is Krishna's Spiritual Energy.
Whenever the Lord incarnates, His Spiritual Energy also takes up a Female Form.
Hence Hindus always worship Laxmi with Narain, Seeta with Ram and Radha with Krishna.
It is redundant to state that one may attain Krishna only through the Grace of Radha.
Read more, click:
http://www.dalsabzi.com/Language_Festivals/radhaashtami

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Was reading: A sculptor was praised for his masterpiece. The sculptor said: The masterpiece was already in the stone, I only needed to chip away useless parts' Easier said than done! But that is what all spiritualists say: There is an Ocean of Peace within. We need to only chip away our jealousies, greed etc. Let us take jealousy.You are jealous of the person, who you think is better than you...Do you really want to waste so much energy on the emotion? Why not use the energy on excelling in something else?
Let us get in touch with what moves us, what we enjoy...I always had so much to say....Now I have my blog and my website and my facebook...and no! I dont spend hours behind my computer, I just write what moves me, think about...and the beauty is that only he/she reads who really wants to...
The easiest way to make an impact is if you have money...because as a friend was sharing: It gives you power to pursue your pleasures and it gives you power, period...but the irony is that if you have enough, you could concentrate on loving and sharing the gifts that the Lord has endowed you with, and you will be loved back...and is'nt that what all human beings seek? To be loved and appreciated?

Thursday, September 09, 2010

I got the following as a fwd:

It was the day after India's Independence Day. A thoughtful Tony Blair
who had watched the celebrations on TV got onto the phone with his
friend Bush:

"
"We English made a mistake George," said Blair, "I need to get India
back as a colony!"

"You serious Tony?" asked a still more startled Bush.

"Yeah this is not the India we let go some sixty years ago," said
Blair, "this is a colony we would be proud to have now."

"So whatcha plannin' to do?" asked Bush.

"Why George what we did to Saddam. Attack them."

"You sayin' we? You not hoping I'm goin' to join you are you?"

"I helped you in Iraq George, you forgettin' or sometin'?"

"Yeah but we had an excuse there Tony, we were lookin' for weapons of
mass destruction, you remember?"

"So we do the same thing here George. We tell the Indians to give up
their weapons of mass destruction!"

"I don't know whether we are doing the right thing Tony, India is a
democracy you know?"

"I lied for you in Iraq George. Nearly lost the elections for you. I'm
sure you could do this lil' favour for me.. With India back as my
colony, we'll be back as a world power! Britain rules the world! You
heard that phrase George?"


"Okay Tony since you insist. Can you call me back in five minutes."

"Shall I get my ships ready?"

"For what?" asked a surprised Bush.

"For war dammit," shouted Tony as he put the phone down and waited for
Bush to talk to the Indian Prime Minister. He walked over to a little
globe he had on his office table and circled India gleefully.

The phone rang and he ran to pick it up.

"Tony it is me," said George, "how many ships you got ready?"

"Aye aye sir, the Royal Navy is ready for action!" said Tony, standing
at attention.

"You can send them to India," said Bush.

"To fight?" asked Blair happily.

"No to pick up their weapons of mass destruction."

"Whatcha talkin' about?" asked a confused Blair.

"Manmohan said you would know 'cause it is your people who made them," said Bush.

"What weapons of mass destruction?" whispered Blair uncertainly.

"Their politicians, their MPs, their MLAs," said Bush happily,
"Manmohan said you could take them all back to England where they were
trained years ago by your people to divide and rule..!"

Wednesday, September 08, 2010




Ganesh Chaturthi will be celebrated on the 11th of September, this year.
Those conversant with Yoga would know that the 'Kundalini Shakti' or primordial energy, rises in a zigzag manner through the Spinal chord, culminating in the third eye, which resides in between the eye-brows. When the trunk of Ganeshji is facing straight forward, it signifies that the passage, though the Spinal chord, or 'Sushumna' is entirely open. When the trunk of Ganeshji is swung right in the air, it means that the 'Kundalini Shakti' has reached the Sahasraar' or the Region of the third eye, permanently.

When Ganeshji's trunk is curved to the right. He is called Siddhi Vinaayak.

Read more, click:

http://www.dalsabzi.com/Language_Festivals/ganesh_chaturti.htm

Sunday, September 05, 2010

...To enjoy the ecstasy of Godhood, deities are evolved by the individual according to his inner nature, his inner being, conducive to his exaltation. One can make this deity in any form and name. When the eternal Lord encompasses everything, even this form and this name is His. If this symbol, this representation, of God leads man to a higher state of consciousness, then, by all means, let man evoke and give it a name. It will surely lead him to the main spring, being born of the main spring.
It will, like a pigeon homing in to the roost, lead him to the Lord.
Deepa Kodikal, excerpt from 'A journey within the Self'